The Real Slim Shady
Ton : EEnglish
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Couplet
EmY'all act like you never seen Ama white person before
Jaws B7all on the floor like Pam and EmTommy just burst in the door
EmAnd started whoopin her ass Amworse than before
They were B7first divorced, throwin Emher over furniture (Ahh!)
EmIt's the return of the... "Ah, Amwait, no way, you're kidding,
B7He didn't just say what I Emthink he did, did he?"
EmAnd Dr. Dre said... Amnothing you idiots!
B7Dr. Dre's dead, he's Emlocked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
EmFeminist women love AmEminem
Chigga chigga B7chigga
"Slim Shady, I'm Emsick of him look at him,
EmWalkin' around grabbin' Amhis you-know-what
Flippin the B7you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's Emso cute though!"
EmYeah, I probably got a couple of Amscrews up in my head loose
But B7no worse, than what's goin Emon in your parents' bedrooms
EmSometimes, I wanna get Amon TV and just let loose, but can't B7
But it's cool for Tom Green to Emhump a dead moose
Em"My bum is on your lips, my Ambum is on your lips"
And if B7I'm lucky, you might just Emgive it a little kiss
And Emthat's the message that we Amdeliver to little kids
And B7expect them not to know what a Emwoman's clitoris is
Of Emcourse they gonna know what Amintercourse is
By the time they hit B7fourth grade
They got the EmDiscovery Channel don't they?
Em"We ain't nothing but Ammammals..." Well, some of us B7cannibals
Who cut other Empeople open like cantaloupes (slurp)
EmBut if we can hump Amdead animals and antelopes
B7Then there's no reason that a man and Emanother man can't elope
EWWW!* EmBut if you feel like AmI feel, I got the antidote
B7Women wave your pantyhose, Emsing the chorus and it goes
Refrain
Refrain (2x)
'Cause EmI'm Slim Shady, yes AmI'm the real Shady
All you B7other Slim Shadys are Emjust imitating
So Emwon't the real Slim Shady Amplease stand up,
B7Please stand up, Emplease stand up?
Couplet
EmWill Smith don't gotta cuss in his Amraps to sell his records;
B7Well I do, so fuck him and Emfuck you too!
You Emthink I give a damn about a AmGrammy?
Half of you B7critics can't even stomach me, Emlet alone stand me
"But EmSlim, what if you win, Amwouldn't it be weird?"
B7Why? So you guys could just lie to Emget me here?
So you Emcan, sit me here Amnext to Britney Spears?
B7Shit, Christina Aguilera Embetter switch me chairs
So I can Emsit next to Carson AmDaly and Fred Durst
And B7hear 'em argue over who she gave Emhead to first
EmYou little bitch, put me on Amblast on MTV
"Yeah, he's B7cute, but I think he's married Emto Kim, hee-hee!"
I should Emdownload her audio on AmMP3
And show the B7whole world how you gave EmEminem VD (Ahhh!)
EmI'm sick of you little girl and Amboy groups, all you do is B7annoy me
So I have been Emsent here to destroy you (bzzzt)
EmAnd there's a million of us Amjust like me
Who B7cuss like me; who just don't Emgive a fuck like me
Who Emdress like me; walk, talk and Amact like me
And B7just might be the next best Emthing but not quite me!
Refrain
Couplet
I'm like a Emhead trip to listen to, Amcause I'm only givin you
B7Things you joke about with your Emfriends inside your living room
The Emonly difference is AmI got the balls to say it
In front of B7y'all and I don't gotta be Emfalse or sugarcoated at all
EmI just get on the mic Amand spit it
And B7whether you like to admit it ERR* EmI just shit it
Better than Emninety percent of you Amrappers out can
Then you wonder B7how can kids eat up these Emalbums like valiums
It's Emfunny; cause at the Amrate I'm goin when I'm thirty
B7I'll be the only person in the Emnursin home flirting
EmPinchin nurses asses Amwhen I'm jackin off with Jergens
And B7I'm jerkin but this whole bag of EmViagra isn't working
And Emevery single person is a AmSlim Shady lurkin
He B7could be workin at Burger King, Emspittin on your onion rings
HACH* EmOr in the parkin lot, Amcircling
Screaming "I B7don't give a fuck!"
With his windows Emdown and his system up
EmSo, will the real Shady Amplease stand up?
And B7put one of those fingers on Emeach hand up?
And be Emproud to be outta your Ammind and outta control
And B7one more time, loud as you Emcan, how does it go?
Refrain (4x)
Ha ha
Guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
Fuck it, let's all stand up